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Thanks for stopping by. I'm That Finance Gal, Joanne Wetzel. My goal here is to make finances more open, honest, and accessible for the modern women. Who says finances have to be oh-so dry and dull? Not this girl! Join me while I foray into financial coaching and help others on their journey to financial peace.

Negative Habits I Let Go Of In 2017 (That You Should, Too!)

Negative Habits I Let Go Of In 2017 (That You Should, Too!)

A STORY TO TELL A STORY

It was a Sunday; not unlike any other. We always went to her house on Sundays for family dinner. It was a warm, muggy June afternoon and the fans were trying, unsuccessfully, to blow the air through the old farmhouse with no central AC. Fortunately, her room had it's own AC unit; though, she didn't need it. She was cold all the time these days.  

Michael sat in the armchair next to her bed and I cozied up on the bed beside her as I had done hundreds of times before. We spent the afternoon combing through jewelry and old memories. Momma made a list of things she wanted each kid to have. I was frustrated. I looked at her and said, "I don't want things. I want you." We all started crying, and Ivy looked at both of us and said, "I wish I had more time." 

And that will be ingrained in my memory for as long as I live. She left us ten days later. 

In the days following, I made a pact to live. I made a promise to her that I would live fully, so as to honor her memory.

2017 was a year of learning some of life's hardest lessons; through that adversity, my eyes were peeled open. I have become aware of so many things in my life were holding me back, including me. In my perseverance, I said no to habits that no longer had a place in my life; I hope this post serves you well to let go, too.

Photo by Tim Marshall on Unsplash

Photo by Tim Marshall on Unsplash

NEGATIVE HABITS I LEFT BEHIND IN 2017 (That You Should, Too!)
 

1. LETTING GO OF PERFECTION

For years, I was crippled with fear of taking the next step in whatever endeavor I was pursuing. I thought, "What will people think?" "It's not ready, it's doesn't look like what everyone else is doing, or I'll look stupid/foolish/silly, etc." Well, guess what? Things are never going to be perfect and if you never start, you can never grow. My advice to you is to let go of having something be perfect and get better as you go. If you wait for perfection, you will wait all your life and miss out on everything life has to offer you.

2. LETTING PEOPLE TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME. 

I made the mistake of confusing friendship with convenience. On more than one occasion, I would be a resource or connection for someone else to further their career or success while being left in the dust later on. Last year, I promised to only surround myself with people who reciprocate, who fill me up, challenge me, and love me for who I am--not what I can do for them. I also learned to set boundaries on my relationships, remove or reduce the ones that didn't serve my life, and make new friends with like minded individuals. 

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3. ENTRUSTING MY SUCCESS TO OTHER PEOPLE.

Success looks different for everyone, of course, but throughout my career as a model, I thought that I had to rely on agents, photographers, casting directors, etc, to make or break where I was going with my life. Isn't that the farthest from the truth? We are the capable hands that guide our success--no one else. Don't let anyone tell you different. It's helpful to know people who know people, to build worthwhile relationships, and have a community support you, but ultimately, you are the hustle, grind, and grit behind your success.

3. TELLING MYSELF I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH

I'm certain that at least half of you reading this are in agreement with me on this. Imagine if we talked to ourselves the way we do our spouses, our children, and our friends? What if we told ourselves all the amazing things we could do and are capable of instead of all the things we can't do? For at least fourteen years, I didn't feel good, pretty, smart, or capable enough. I put my worth and value in the opinions of other people. Now? I know better. I am a capable, strong, and courageous person who has the world at her feet. I just want you to know that you are, too. Don't let your value be deteriorated, because of other opinions. Those opinions never cut you a check.

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4. THINKING I'VE GOT TIME TO WASTE

Some days I get so mad at myself for all the years I wasted on misguided priorities; I know, I know, without those trials, I wouldn't be the girl I am today. But, truly, life is a blip. As they say, we only get one shot of this. Do you want to look back and say, "Oh yeah, I spent hours watching Netflix (everything in moderation, of course!), working a job I hate, and missing out on all the things I really wanted to do." Nope, not at all what you want to look back on! Carpe diem. Live with gusto. All that jazz. In the end, you won't regret it. (Oh, and if there is a day where you don't feel like being on the grind, then just rest. We need those days, too, for our growth!)

5. SAYING YES TO EVERYTHING.

I touched on this a little bit during my Instagram Live a couple of weeks ago--your time is your families' time. When I first launched a business, I took every opportunity. What I didn't realize is that I was doing myself, my clients, and my family a disservice. When putting anything on your calendar, make sure it brings you joy; and if you have to be away from your family--you want it to be something that contributes to the higher purpose and value of your life, your career, and/or your business. There are many days I wish I could get back from bookings that didn't end up in any kind of fruition, photographically or monetarily, and to be honest, I would've rather been home hanging out in yoga pants with my dogs. Be choosy, say no when you don't think it's a good fit, and safeguard your time. It's fleeting and precious.

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6. NOT HONORING MY BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT. 

I listened to a SuperSoul Conversation recently where Oprah and her guest, Geneen Roth, talk about conscious eating. Geneen says, "I didn't quite get that the food that going in the mouth was not about loneliness, comfort, or sweetness, or whatever, or because I felt empty, but that I was feeding this [She points to her body]. So, that was one thing. The other thing is just gratitude for having a body at all." What she means is that she eats consciously to be kinder to her body, not for comfort. I struggled for a long time with realizing that I have to care for my body. In the same bead of thought, I have to do the same for my mind and spirit. A healthy, happy existence doesn't just happen. You must put in to yourself, what you want to get out. With that, I eat healthier, I read more, I spend more time outdoors reflecting and contemplating, I exercise, I breathe deeply -- all of those things lead to a more positive existence. I want to care for myself the way I would care for others, because we are also important. Don't forget that.


If you want to check in with yourself and see if you need to let go and leave a few things behind, ask yourself these questions:

How am I living?
What am I doing in this one life to make it extraordinary?
Is this where I want to be in five years?
Am I using my life for a greater purpose?

If you don't have any answers or disagree with any of those questions, likely, you may need to re-prioritize somethings and take full advantage of these negative habits to leave behind.


And, I want to know: Was 2017 as life changing for you? What habits did you leave behind in 2017?

 

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